Doing the Hard Things Even When You Do Not Feel Like It | Love Talk
I love my children with everything in me, but like every parent, I also need to teach them a few lessons that help them grow into strong and responsible adults.
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The other day, Zaya asked if she could go hang out with her friends. Before I give an answer, I usually take a little trip to her room just to see what it looks like. If I see clothes on the floor or a half-done chore, she always has a story about what she was “about to do” or what she “was in the middle of finishing.” I love that child, but I hear some very creative explanations in that room.
So I told her what I always tell her. If you do what you have to do, then you can do what you want to do. That is something I believe with my whole heart. She looked at me and said she was feeling “overstimulated” and needed time to “process.” I asked her what in the world she was overstimulated by. These children have new words for everything.
I had to remind her of a lesson many grownups still struggle with. You do not have to love a thing in order to do it. There are chores, responsibilities, and hard things in life that none of us enjoy. I do not love going to the gym, but I want to be healthy. I do not love traffic, but I want to get to where I am going. Life often requires us to do things that do not feel good in the moment, but they bring us somewhere better.
The same thing is true in our walk with God and in our relationships. Many people say their relationships are not working, but sometimes the truth is that they are not working. They are not communicating. They are being sarcastic instead of honest. They are expecting love to feel like Disneyland every day. Real love requires conversations that make you uncomfortable. It requires listening. It requires patience. The Bible tells us the first thing about love is that it is patient. Love is also sacrificial. Love sent Jesus to the cross. That is a love that works even when it hurts.
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I tell my children that learning how to work is a gift. When parents shield their kids from every hard thing, the kids grow up never learning how to push through difficulty. When my kids ask for something they did not work for, I do not give it. When they leave my house, they will need discipline. They will need resilience. And they will need to understand that life will not always be easy.
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You cannot quit every job because you do not like it. You cannot run from every church because it does not feel perfect. You cannot abandon every challenge because it is uncomfortable. When you say you love something, you show it by working for it.
That is my Love Talk for today. It is not always easy and it does not always feel good, but love is shown through action. When you love it, you work for it.
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